19 Lovely Days of Christmas
by efftless
Summary: I know it's early, but it'll last, I promise. Well anyway, Christmas begins to shine, and everyone's personality alters ridiculously. Maybe it's the weather's fault? Who knows. Lot's of Parings, Humor, and Yaoi. Dashed with a lil' AU and a bit' OOC
1. Day 1

19 Lovely Days of Christmas

I know it's early, but I couldnt' resist.

Warnings: Nothing

A/N I realized I had no idea how to say the words teme/seme/dobe/etc. I recently learned uke is spoken (oo-kei) weird. (I could be wrong AGAIN) If anyone would help me out that'll be great.

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Ah. The time is here, the 25 greatest days of the year. Where emotion washes over, the cozy breeze cold and warm, the smell of cookies and goods. It just fills the whole village with great felicity **(recently learned word)** bringing joy and happiness to everyone's faces.

"I love this time of year" She started, AGAIN. "It gets so cold, but the good thing is that you can cuddle with anyone you want without having to make up an excuse." Sakura began giggling.

"Yeah."

" ... "

Her two comrades didn't really bother with the subject.

"Heheheh..." Sakura was struck with guilt that began to sink into her heart. Remembering what the two boys have been through recently. And far worse back then, Naruto not having a family to warm up to. Sasuke's just... torn apart. It must've been really hard.

"Ummm.. you guys, since we're going to take an extended break from school, why not come to my house tomorrow night? I'm holding a party with all the guys!"

" --- "

" ... "

Naruto left without saying a word, and Sasuke just didn't respond, staring into space. The girl sighed, 'I know they'll come, they didn't have anything better to do right..?'

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"I don't -- have any money, to buy anything for you, or anyone.." Naruto spoke. "I really don't fit in during this time of year ya' know?"

"Tch. Shuddup, we have alot of work to do." Gaara held his hand and dragged him towards the blizzard.

"Where we go---"

"To get some munny."

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'Everyone is gonna get me something, even though I don't give a damn about them. Why is everyone so nice to me? Do they feel pity? Just because I have no family, doesn't mean I need their help. No one has it as bad as me... except ..._You_..'

"Yo, Sasuke."

" ... " Sasuke looked up recognizing the voice. "Hey Kiba."

"Wanna go get that job with me?"

"Job?"

"That new toy shop across Ichiraku remember? It'll be fast pay, since Christmas is nearing."

Kiba was right, and it would be easy. I could actually get a good gift at a discount too for _You_..

"Yo. SASUKE!! YOU AWAKE????"

"Ughhhh." Sasuke responded to Kiba's waving and close face yelling.

"Yeah yeah, I'll go."

"Alright, first of all, get that attitude up, you need to have a good attitude to win the interview. You're gonna have to be smiling for 8 straight hours everyday if you get the job."

"Shit.." The Uchiha slapped himself constantly till he _woke_ up. "How do i... look..?"

Sasuke looked up, trying to smile. His face seemed to be at war, struggling with the muscles on his face that never flexed in such a way demonic way.

"You look great!" Kiba lied. 'ewwww... '

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"You start tomorrow."

"Eh... eheh... eheheheheheheheheheh... ehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehhhhhh.." a trembling annoyance echoed.

"You ok, Naruto?"

"EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH!!"

"Errrr is your friend gonna be ok?"

"Yeah i think so." Gaara dragged his friend out of the restaurant with a smirk. The red head knew how to get his blonde happy.

"KIYOSAIKUUNOUSUKIIIIIII!!" A screech of the young boy was heard throughout the village.

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"What.. the fuck.. was that..." Sasuke whispered to himself. He looked around aggressively to see where that sound came from. "Okay..." Sasuke chuckled. "Im officially crazy."

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THIS TIME Im GOING to FINISH this fic. IT WILL BE FINISHED. The thing is, I'm going to update very very slowly, so that the last chapter is updated on _the day_. So yeah C8. Oh yeah, has anyone seen the latest opening and ending? XD I thought it was cute, but I really really really really really really really hate Sai really. He's very unsexy. (Runs away as the crowd gets their pitchforks).


	2. Day 2

19 Lovely Days of Christmas

Warnings: OOC-ness

(A/N: Love is in many forms, so it is respected no matter how different, unlike in this caged country.)

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"I shall give my Sakura-chan a frozen flower, that reflects the light of YOUTH!"

"Heh. Pathetic."

"Oh really Neji?! What are you getting for you know who?!"

"Heh... Well.. if you insist... **(Warning: Very VERY OOC)** IM GONNA GET MY TENTEN SOME SHINY RIBBONS AND BOWS, SO THAT WHEN SHE WEARS THEM HER GRACEFULNESS GLISTENS , THE BEAUTY OF HER SKIN THAT JUST SHINES BRIGHTLY AS HER SOUL IS TARNISHED IN MY LOOOOVEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! That's what I'm getting her... Fool."

"Tch. You guys are lame." A voice arosed.

"OH REALLY SHIKAMARU?!" The two boys barked back.

"Oh yeah, really, unlike you guys, the guy I'm after isn't really into such _graceful _things... just one second in bed with me, and he'll be all over me and i probably don't have to do anything but just sit there and enjoy myself." Shikamaru stated so cooly, and awesomely as he stretched and looked away.

"PFFFTTTTTTT!" Neji practically choked on his spit.

"I know Naruto, and I don't think he's into guys. He also told me he hated this time of year too!" Lee spoke in a manly tone.

"Yeah yeah, words words." Shikamaru just yawned and closed his eyes.

"Well.." Chouji began to speak. "Well... I li--"

"Anyway, why would Sakura have a party on the 2nd day of Christmas? We're far away from the gift giving day." Ino interrupted.

"Yeah, she's weird." "Maybe _psycho._.." Neji whispered into Lee's ear.

"SHUDDUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP! YOU'RE AFTER A GIRL WHOSE THE LEAST FAVORITE CHARACTER ON THE SET!!"

A silence brewed, that annoying cricket began to sing. And that ironic tumble weed rolls in.

"Wrong line dufus." Ino whispered.

"ERrrrrr ehehehehehehehhehehehe... I mean ummmm...-ahem- Don't be mean Neji, maybe she's going through something, and needs company?"

"Well, I thi--"

"We're going no matter what, it's just why are we going?" Ino rudely interrupted Chouji _again._

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_Meanwhile._

"Oh, Naruto-kun?" A soft voice was heard

"Oh! Hey Hinata! Ordering something?"

"Oh, no. I---I'm in the girl scouts selling warm cookies around town."

"Oh. Trying to get some munny eh?"

"Oh yes, same for you?"

"Oh yeah! Getting a gift for everyone and that certain someone!" The boy winked.

"Oh, ok...!" Hinata blushed. **(LOL i used oh in the beginning of each sentence..)**

"Uhhhhhh.. I gotta get these orders out, so.. uhh.. talk to you later?"

"Umm.. yeah. I was gonna go sell some cookies at Sasuke's shop across the street anyway."

"AKSJWOEFASDFGAGF!!!" A sound came from Gaara behind the blonde sounded so strange. Like a cough/sneeze/choke/and a gurgle all in one.

"You ok Gaara?!" The blonde rushed to his funky friend.

"Ughhh yeah.." _'Shit. Sasuke across the street? That hottie working so close to us might ruin my super duper evil dark plans...'_

"Ehehehehehehe.. choked on some water." Gaara coughed.

"Well.. see ya Naruto-kun!" Hinata yelled

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Couple seconds later across the street.

"Thank. You. Here's. Change. Come. Again." The Uchiha smiled uncontrollably. Still trying to train himself to smile.

"Thank you!" A costumer said _'Psycho...'_

"Hey buddy..." Kiba spoke. "When are you gonna stop talking like a robot?"

"What. Are. You. Talking. A. Bout.?!?!?!" Sasuke's voice began to rise. 'How do people smile?! It's so FREAKIN HARD!'

"Ehhh... never mind... Oh! Hey Hinata!" The boy howled, and so did his jacket.

"Teehee, Akamaru in there?"

"Ehehehehehe shhhh shhh-"

"Anyway, wanna buy some cookies? Im selling them for girl's scouts."

"Ummmm... We're good. Thanks anyway!"

"Awww. Ok."

"Why watsup?"

"Oh.. I've been around town trying to sell them. No one wants them, even I don't."

"Ahahahahahah, nice one. Well I wish you good luck! Maybe try Naruto? He's a cookie monster!"

"Oh, no. I tried to give him some, but he was too busy working across the street from here.

"KAGHSJKHDGSFHSJKD" A sound came from behind Kiba that sounded like a sheep and an elephant making love.

"Meh, Ichiraku eh...?" Kiba barked.

"Yaya. Well.. I have cookies to sell.. bye!"

"See ya! Umm... Sasuke...you alright..?"

"Get. Me. Tissue. Please." The robot voice spoke as blood ran down the boy's nose.

"Pervert."

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Im sorry, the characters are like this, just because they all have a part in my devillish play. Anyway, Review pleasee!


	3. Day 2 and a Half

19 Lovely Days of Christmas

Warnings: Stupidity + OOC + Retarded Humor

A/N: Ummmmm... yeah... you guys might have to add detail to the story with your imagination. Sorry -cries-

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"Oh Gaara! Oh.. where's Naruto?"

"He's sorta working overtime, he's really in need of munny. Sorry Sakura."

" ... "

"What?"

"If you're his best friend, wouldn't you help him?"

"Already tried, he says it'll ruin it's 'special-ness'." Gaara gestured with his fingers.

"Hm. Alright, come on in."

The Red Head shuffled through the crowd in the house. Very full, but very boring. Everyone was dancing, kareoke, blah blah blah. BORING. The choking smoke, that disgusting smell of beer, he got so tired of it. So he just walked out to the back porch to chill. And look who it is. Mr. Uchiha, Perfect, Mysterious, and Dark. The Qualities of every dream boat. And that dog-boy next to him. The sexiness of him that no one can describe.

"So.."

_'Ugh, he's not gonna start...' _Sasuke thought.

"What are you dicks doing out here by yourselves?

"Shuddup." The two answered in a freaky synchronized tone.

"My, my, I can tell you guys are already jealous. I'm almost winning the bet."

"Tch. Yeah right." Sasuke said annoyed

"23 more days biotch." Kiba answered.

"Oh? Looks like you guys forgot the rules already. Don't you remember? Whoever gets in '_bed'_ with Naruto BEFORE New Years eve, gets payed 1,000 bucks. Each. Doesn't matter if it IS on Christmas."

"Yeah yeah, go suck a dick." Kiba growled.

"Where is Naruto anyway?"

"At the shop. It's so cold, I might go back there to '_warm'_ him up a bit." Gaara teased

"Not unless I get to him first.." Sasuke talked back, slyly.

Sasuke then slowly stood up and began walking inside. And at that Gaara began to follow, and then take lead. And before you knew it, they dashed for the door, but it took awhile.. since all the people and shit in the way.

"Tch. losers." Kiba smiled at himself

8 minutes later.

**"HGJASHJGASDF YESSS! FINALLY OUT OF THAT FUCKING HOUSE!!"** The Uchiha yelled out of triumphant.

"HEHEHEHEHEHE! NANANANANANAHH!!" Sasuke taunted the red head still struggling to get out of the house. Sakura's house was ridiculously large. And had a ridiculous amount of people in it, which didn't really help!

"Now to get my head start!" And at that Sasuke began to make a run for the shop.

"UGHHH that's it.. **GGEETT TTHHEE FFUUCCKK OOUUTT OOFF MMYY WWAAYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"** Gaara's voice was so deep and loud, everyone thought it was the world's end. And moved out of the boy's fucking way.

"UGHHH HE'S TOO AHEAD!! OH WAIT! I KNOW!! SHORT CUT!!!!" Gaara then dashed a different direction.

-A couple moment's later-

"OSHIT! WHAT THE FUCK, HOW'D HE GET SO CLOSE BEHIND ME?!?!"

"AHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAH !!!" Gaara was having_ too _much fun at this moment.

And before you knew it, the distance between them turned from yards, to feet, to inches, centimeters, and they were both at the same speed, same distance from the shop.

"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!!" The ruffling noise, the hard breathing, the constant cussing. Was heard all 'round town, as they ran to the shop like mad gorillas at the zoo. And before you know it..

"NARUTO!!!" The two screamed out their lungs as they reached the shop, desperate for their blonde.

"Heh? HEY GAARA! HEY... " The blonde paused as he saw Sasuke, then looked back to his customer.

"Hehehehehehe." A voice echoed from the costumer. As the costumer turned around to greet the two.

"Yo."

" **-PANT PANT PANT- **"

"Well... -chuckle- if you're wonderin' how I got here before you guys, I simply hoped over the backyard fence, and practically took my sweet ass time walkin' here."

" ... "

"Haha. What..?" The boy began to laugh non-stop.

"KIBA YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The proud Uchiha threw himself at the boy, strangling him by the neck.

"AAARGGHJSDGAESRCd!!!!"

"SASUKE. STOP." And at that demanding voice. The Uchiha looked at the blonde, and whimpered.

"What are you guys doing here anyway?"

**Gaara** : "I WANTED TO HELP YOU!"

**Kiba** : "I WANTED TO SEE YOU!"

**Sasuke** : "I WANTED TO DO YOU! **AHDJSGA I MEAN SEE YOU TOO!!!!!!**"

**Naruto** : ...

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Meanwhile.

"I.. Am.. So... Gonna.. KILL THOSE GUYS!!"

"Sakura. Chill."

"SHUDDUP SHIKAMARU!"

"You really should chill Sakura, it's just a table. and a chair... and a... $1000 vase... and... a door..."

"Ino... those bastards... owe me... so fucking much... **IM GONNA BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**"

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Back to the shop.

Kiba : "Woah.. Did you feel that Sasuke?"

Sasuke : "Yeah I did feel it."

Gaara : "You guys felt it too?"

Naruto : "Heh? What are you weirdo's talking about? Feel what?! Am I being punked?!"

"I felt... a disturbance..." Sasuke's voice became so low, and his skin became so white.

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Me : -sigh- It makes me sad that I don't get reviews.

Neji : Pathetic.

ME : Yeah, yeah, maybe the crowd doesnt get my sense of humor? Or... Maybe my jokes are really lame?!?!

Chouji : Nah, they're al----

Naruto : They suck soooo much. You make me sleepy.

Sasuke : I know, THERE ISN'T ANY _ACTION_!

Me : Don't worry... I got something up my sleeve... or do i?


End file.
